relationship

Not all relationships succeed.  There are many reasons why a certain relationship fails.  More often than not, a person would go through a number of unsuccessful relationships before having a successful one.  Any kind of relationship will go through a lot of challenges and it is often not easy to surmount these challenges and to make a relationship stronger in the process.  Making a relationship work out is certainly not the easiest thing in the world.

Being in a successful relationship is not a matter of luck or kismet.  A successful relationship is borne out of the conscious efforts of the both partners to make things work despite their differences and despite the adversities and challenges they face.  There are a few basic truths about relationships, aside from love, and they are mostly founded on common sense but are oftentimes overlooked or taken for granted.  However, if these secrets of successful relationships are unlocked and are lived out, a successful and deeply satisfy relationship can be achieved:

Learn Acceptance.  Accepting your partner for who they really are is an important key to any successful relationship.  Living in hopeful fantasies and idealized perceptions about your partner will lead not only to frustrations and disappointments but also to a failed relationship.  One of the very first steps and important foundations of a successful relationship is for both partners to accept the other for who they really are – for all their strengths and human frailties, their achievements and failures, and their past and potentialities.

Your partner must also fully see and accept you as who you really are.  You should not be afraid to reveal your real self instead of letting your partner love the “cleaned up” version of yourself.  You will never truly feel loved if your partner will not love you for who you really are and no relationship will succeed without acceptance.  Sound expectations in a relationship are based on acceptance.

Don’t Give Up Your Identity.  You will not be doing yourself a favor if you give up your identity just to suit your partner or if you lose yourself by becoming overly enmeshed into the relationship.  You are a unique individual just like everyone else.  Your partner loved you for your unique qualities.  If your partner wants you to suit to his expectations and force you into his or her idealized version of what and who you should be, then your partner do not really love and you just have to move on.

Mutual Respect.  One important element of every successful relationship is mutual respect.  A healthy and successful relationship does not thrive on shaming, contempt, or being dismissive toward one another.  You and your partner must respect each other and never lose that respect.  The moment respect is lost in a relationship, it has started to be doomed to fail.  Respect does not only constitute respect of a partner’s individuality but also of his/her feelings, needs, thoughts, and aspirations.

Complement, Not Complete, Each Other.  Do not make your partner be responsible to give your life meaning because only you can do that.  Healthy and successful relationships are made up of two complete individuals and not of people who need others to complete them.  Partners who complement each other, rather than complete each other, make for successful relationships. While complementing each other and enriching the relationship, each partner retains their separate and distinct individualities.

The Importance Of Trust.  Profound trust is a basic requisite for love and real intimacy.  When trust is broken, any relationship will find it hard to succeed.  Breach of trust is one of the most common reasons why many relationships fail to succeed.  Once trust is broken, it is almost impossible to mend it and save a relationship.

..hope this was helpfull,

Billy Baker