When you’re out on a first date with someone, it doesn’t take long to figure out that you fancy him/her. In fact, experts have agreed that it only takes us between 90 seconds and 4 minutes to decide if we actually like a person. A good one-liner might help in creating a good first impression but you need to get your body language right from the start so you can make sure your date will stick around to find out more about you.
According to Mari Smith, a relationship guru from San Diego, California, studies showed that only 7% of our communication is verbal and the other 93% is nonverbal. This translates to the fact that body language is so powerful and important in dating and you must act and react positively to get good results. To help you have a successful date take note of the following do’s and dont’s of body language in dating.
1. Make a good first impression with your eyes. Convey your feelings though them. Maintain eye contact 50% of the time when you are listening and 90% of the time when you are speaking. Always keep you face engaged to your partner to show your interest in them.
2. Smile genuinely and not with your mouth only. A true smile can make your date comfortable and will help you appear confident and friendly.
3. Speak calmly, slowly, and make use of gestures and physical touches during communication. Lean in and nod in agreement if you are listening.
4. Have a relaxed posture. Keep your shoulders back so you’re chest will come out a bit. This will imply that you’re open and confident.
5. Make big and timed steps to show confidence and power while walking. Be sure to allow a nice, comfortable distance when walking with your date.
6. Trust your gut instinct. Positive signals are much easier to read. If you feel that your date also likes you then start showing your appreciation by flirting and giving some physical touches.
1. Avoid eye contact as it can mean submissiveness and dishonesty. Staring for too long is considered improper. Rolling your eyes and sighing can be a sign of frustration and can turn off your date.
2. Frown, grimace, or fake your smile. Negative facial expressions will make you appear disinterested, grumpy and anxious.
3. Fidget, look around, and make tapping noises with your fingers or feet. It can signal boredom or nervousness. You will also appear worried and tense.
4. Sit with your arms crossed or put your hands inside your pocket. It can imply protectiveness and is considered a defensive body language. You don’t want to look like a guard who likes to intimidate people. You want to appear open and approachable at all times.
5. Flail your arms wildly when walking. Excessive arm and head movements are distracting and can signal that you are not in control.
6. Judge and jump into conclusions. Your partner might be exhibiting a negative body language but don’t be easily discouraged. Body language experts suggest you follow the Rule of Four where you verify at least 4 signals telling the same thing before totally accepting it.
Your body language can make or break your date. If properly exhibited, your actions during a date can create an instant bond and mutual attraction with your partner. On the other hand, if you’re not careful with your body language you can turn off your date and might never get a second chance to make it right. It is vital to learn and practice to have a happy and successful relationship in the future. More on body language.