Online romances are becoming more and more common with the advent of social networking, blogging and online dating sites, just to name a few services dedicated to romance. Meeting that special person online is becoming more of the norm than the exception as it used to be, even five years ago. Think how far dating sites have come; people who would never have met each other, simply because of logistics and geography, are now chatting, having cyber dates and other such activities. However, the time will come when you yearn to meet them in person, to feel their warmth, experience their touch.
Put on the brakes for just one minute, or however long it takes for you to read the following four rules to remember before meeting your online love interest for the first time.
1) Slow down
You are moving too fast if you are planning to meet and it’s only been a month. Let the new passion and excitement die down a bit, and wait until one or both of you have had at least one moment where you honestly don’t know if they are the one for you or not. You do not have to have met the person to react in a certain way to that sort of telling moment. Wait, and in a few months, get together and move past those hurtful moments together. Wi-fi cannot transmit the other person’s small expressions, looks of exhaustion, or the sparkle in their eyes when you two look at each other.
2) Talk and listen to your dearest friends
You know the person you need to talk to. It is the person who will always tell you the truth, even if you don’t want to hear it. They do not tell you because they want to be right, but they tell you because they want what is best for you. Listen to them, even if you don’t want to. If your Internet love interest is meeting you on your turf, arrange a short meeting between a few of your closest friends and the new person in your life. Let your friends get a reading on him, and be sure to listen to your own instincts as well.
3) Curb your expectations
Be realistic and know that the person you are meeting will not be the same person you are smitten over online. The pictures, letters and videos online might not accurately represent the person as a whole. Focus on just liking what you do know about the person and remember that real world relationships are difficult and trying.
4) Make a plan
Try not to be the person who is racing to make airplane reservations because you have accepted a last minute invitation from your online mate. Rushing will make everything more difficult that it needs to be, as it will be tricky enough as it is.
The reasonable person will find a hotel near your online love’s house, rent your own transportation, and prepare to meet a person for the first time. It may fizzle, who knows? Prepare yourself for that, and plan to explore the town that you are visiting by yourself at least once. You needn’t spend every waking moment together. Even if sparks are flying and the chemistry is beyond belief, save some excitement for the next trip, and look forward to a return visit.
…enjoy,
Billy Baker
